We have nothing to fear but fear itself! So speak the great American leaders. Being of the plebeian variety, my motivating thought has all too often been: I have nothing to fear but embarrassment.
Just as one never attempts the possible in order to avoid failure; I avoid embarrassment at all costs. I plan, I plot, I educate myself. I think things through, I consider the logical conclusions of my actions. I do my laundry, press my clothes, maintain a regular sleep and grooming schedule; all toward the goal of “having it all together.”
It is important to me to do the right thing. Lately I began to question my motives. Am I doing the right thing out of a noble, altruistic heart? Or am I constantly doing the right thing in order to show others how it ought to be done? To prove that I have it altogether? To avoid, through super human effort, mistakes; or, heaven forbid; embarrassment.
I had a wonderful time Wednesday night. Philip and I took an impromptu mother / son night out and viewed Star Trek. After the screening, I hit the ladies room (as is my custom); we struck a fast pace toward the car, all the while in conversation and critique of the movie. The gas gage pegged at empty so I decided to fill up on the way home rather than chance a late arrival at work the next day.
We found an after-nine, discount gas station and commenced the filling and window washing. From the shadows near the air compressor I heard a male voice call, “Miss.” I ignored him. Coming a bit closer, he hailed me again, “Miss, excuse me, Miss,” From the corner of my eye I saw a young man in his twenties, with garish henna hair and sideburns stepping toward me. Was he going to ask me for money? Directions? Quickly I looked to see where Philip was. In the car, talking on his cell phone. “I hope he is paying attention to what is going on out here!” I thought as I looked up. “Oh, Miss, there is something about to fall out of your pocket!”
(My pocket? Do I have pockets? If I reach for my back pockets that draws my attention and effectively ties up my arms. And this guy is approaching me. Where is his friend?)
Keeping my eyes on him, I reached behind with my left arm, my strong right arm at the ready. Nothing. Then I reached behind with my right arm, my left hand free, and grasped it – the 18 inch strip of toilet paper- as my informant faded back into the shadows and was gone.
I am now recovered from my laughter – and my false assurance of having it all together.
Way to much information. Running your car low on gas will lead to early fuel pump failure, as most modern fuel pumps are located in the gas tank, and depend on the fuel to keep them cool. It does not cost any more to fiil up at a quarter tank then it does to run it empty. Also, as a safety issue, you should have filled up before your night out on the town. Doing so would prevent your having to stop at places late at night where strange people congregate, and you would not run the risk of running out of gas if you were being followed, and needed to detour to a safe haven.
I’ve heard “having it all together” isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. See, I’d be thinking “God must be chuckling and wondering how long I’m going to try to be so serious about the event”. Oh well . . . go boldly into the night!
OH NO! LOL, thanks for sharing! Wanna hear another one?
Matt was on his way to the restroom at work the other day when one of his fellow employees walked by with a gift for another coworker that was graduating. “What’s that?” Matt asked.
“Cookies!” replied the girl, and went on her way, leaving Matt to use the restroom.
“C is for cookies, and cookies are for meeee,” Matt sang, alone (he thought) in the loo.
From one of the stalls came stifled laughter.
Whoops.
Sometimes these embarrassing moments are blessings in disguise aren’t they?
One of the greatest things in life is being able to laugh at ourselves. Who among us actually has it all together? We are all faking it till we finally discover that others are not paying attention anyway, save the young man who just tries to help. LOL as we laugh with you, reminded that we are really laughing at our own missteps. Then we discover we are all so much alike in our own different ways.