Rule Number 1:


Never, ever, make someone feel bad. Its not nice to make someone feel bad. Nice people never make someone feel bad. So if you are a child, be very careful that you never disobey your parents. If you disobey, even once, it will make your parents feel bad. Your mother will say, “Don’t you love mommy? It makes mommy feel bad when you do not obey.” If you do not obey your father he will say, “What have I done wrong that I have raised a child that does not obey.” He will feel bad. You don’t want to make anyone feel bad.


If you are a student at school or a worker in an office, never succeed above your peers. It makes them feel stupid if you get a better grade on a test or if you can naturally do a skill they have not yet mastered. Do not make them feel bad by being better than they are. Everyone knows it is not nice to act better than someone else. Hide your skills. You do not want others to feel bad.


If you are an adult in charge of others, don’t correct your underlings when they make an error, encourage them instead. If you correct them, they may feel bad and think you are not a nice person.


If you are a spouse, take care that you never make your mate feel bad. Instead, choose words that encourage. If you disagree, never infer that your spouse’s position is wrong. You must put things in the best light, beat around the bush, change your position if you find yourself coming dangerously close to the heart of the matter. Never ask them to do something they don’t want to do. You must not make them feel bad.


If you are writing or speaking to any of the general public, be sure you choose a vocabulary that is positive and uplifting whether it gets the point across or not. Otherwise someone will say, “That’s too preachy,” and you will be devastated that you almost went to press with something that would make someone feel bad. You must never, ever, make someone feel bad. Nice people just don’t do that.


Congratulations! You have made yourself responsible for the feelings and happiness of everyone else. You are now codependent.

Immersed in Music

Immersed in Music.  One thing I dearly love is the ambiance of the music world whether it is sitting in the lobby of the music building at a college, or attending a music seminar at Estes Park. I love walking through a fine arts building and seeing a couple of students practicing for a conducting final; someone writing a sonata in his or her head and making notes on notebook paper; five or six others singing clips of various show tunes or classical pieces; instrumental music floating down the hall from the practice rooms.  Today I went on a family outing to the mountains and a hot springs and was pleasantly treated to just such a musical indulgence. Everyone in the nine passenger Suburban, was related to me: 3 children, 3 grandchildren, one DIL.  While sitting properly stuffed in the very center of the vehicle, I heard and enjoyed intelligent music and movie commentary and critique from the the couple in the front seat, music trivia and questions from all those over 18 and random bars of music hummed, sung, or belted along with the IPod selections playing on the speakers, by all passengers – not to mention excellent rhythm keeping and input from the 3 youngsters aboard.  It was a perfectly lovely day: steeped in music and stewed in the hot springs enjoyed by all while falling snow frosted our hair.